First Communion is a special occasion for both the child and the parents. The preparations, which last several months, the anticipation, and finally the moment of receiving the sacrament evoke strong emotions. The whole situation becomes more complicated and causes even greater stress when the parents are divorced. Most people then wonder how to organize everything and how to prepare their child for such an important day while living apart. A child’s First Communion and parental divorce—below, we dispel any doubts and answer the most frequently asked questions.
Can a child receive First Communion if the parents are divorced?
Many divorced couples ask, even before preparations for First Holy Communion begin, whether their child can receive the sacrament at all. Although the answer seems obvious, doubts almost always arise. The Church clearly states that the parents’ divorce is not an obstacle that would prevent a child from receiving First Communion. After all, the sacrament is administered to the young person, not the parents, and it is the child’s faith and proper preparation for the entire event that are most important.
Can divorced parents receive Communion with their child?
According to tradition, during the First Communion Mass, the child’s parents and godparents also receive the sacrament. In the case of divorced individuals, the situation becomes problematic. The Church’s position on this matter is clear: divorced persons should not receive Holy Communion. These prohibitions are supported by both Scripture and Canon Law. In the Bible, we find the following passages:
- In the fifth chapter of the Gospel of Saint Matthew, we read: “It has also been said, ‘Whoever wants to divorce his wife must give her a certificate of divorce.’ But I tell you: Anyone who divorces his wife—except for the case of sexual immorality—causes her to commit adultery; and whoever marries a divorced woman commits adultery.”
—In St. Paul’s First Letter to the Corinthians, it is written: “To those who are married, I give this command—not I, but the Lord: A wife must not separate from her husband! If she does leave, let her remain unmarried or be reconciled to her husband. Nor should a husband divorce his wife.”
It is also worth reviewing Canon 915 of the Code of Canon Law, according to which persons “persisting obstinately in manifest grave sin” may not receive the sacrament of the Eucharist.
John Paul II also addressed the situation of divorced persons in the context of Holy Communion in his apostolic exhortation *Familiaris consortio*. It states that, based on Sacred Scripture, the Church does not permit divorced persons who have entered into a new civil union to receive Communion. It should be added that the same applies to persons living in informal unions. Sometimes one encounters the view that a civil divorce alone has no canonical effects. This is interpreted to mean that since, in the view of the Catholic Church, a civil divorce does not dissolve the marriage, divorced persons may receive Holy Communion. Of course, the situation changes when one of the parties has a new partner. In practice, most divorced parents do not receive Holy Communion.
First Communion and Divorced Parents—How to Explain It to a Child?
When the parents of a child receiving First Holy Communion are divorced, the child will ask a lot of questions. So how should you answer them? It’s a good idea to have a sincere conversation with your child many months before the ceremony and prepare them for the situation. It is essential to explain the significance of the event and make the child aware of how important this moment is. When questions arise about why the parents do not receive the sacrament, honesty is key. Telling your child the truth and explaining why this is the case will certainly be appreciated. Let’s remember, however, that we must be tactful and use language during the conversation that the child will understand. It is important not to alienate the child from the Church in the process.
It should be emphasized that the fact that parents cannot receive Communion does not mean they cannot attend Mass with their child. Let’s keep in mind that this is a special moment for our child, and to a large extent, it depends on us how they experience the celebration. Therefore, it’s important to treat each other with respect and to be open in our conversation with the child. Pretending that nothing happened and claiming there’s no reason for discussion is probably the worst possible option.
